Saturday, November 9, 2013

Yoga and a Big Girl....Fail!

Ok, I’ve admitted to myself that I’m no longer comfortable in my own skin.  When I was younger I was always small…to the point of looking like a little boy, flat chest, no hips, nothing girlish at all about me.
SO!  Thinking that it might be better to start off slow, and also being afraid of a broken bone trying to jog or *shudder* do aerobics, I figured the best plan of action was simple stretches, right? 

My first goal is to get a little flexibility back.  To be able to get down on the floor and play with the baby or pick up toys without having to get up ass-first.  You know how I mean get up on all fours and butt-up, then squat, then stand (with luck).  Hmmm, like a 2-year-old with no sense of balance does!
Ok, enough rambling and getting to the point.  I figured…stretch…meditation…breathing exercises = yoga! 

Being pleased with my decision, I promptly googled ‘yoga for beginners’ there are somewhere in the neighborhood of 9,086,589,763,209,875,437,625,474 yoga stretches and poses?!?!
I spent the better part of a day on Google yesterday feeling a bit overwhelmed.  Not to mention that if you try to Google images of said yoga poses to see what they are supposed to look like…it cross referenced a LOT of porn, hehe!

Feeling confident in myself, well, not so much as "myself" as in my decision to DO SOMETHING, I printed out all the little directions for about 25 warm up stretches and postures. 

Needless to say I looked nothing like the happy little trim cartoon figure that illustrated these ‘very simple’ postures for broken-down-old-beginners.  And I think I have a rug burn on my forehead now.

Adamant in moving on with my life and my new chosen direction, I managed to do all the exercises, although I look nothing like a tree and only managed to give the sun a half-hearted salutation.
About halfway through my ‘relaxing, weight losing, stress free postures’, I became aware that my breath was starting to come in ragged gasps and I was afraid that I would fall over while imitating said tree and knock myself unconscious.  No such luck! 

30 minutes later I finished and stretchy and am looking forward to being able to breathe again sometime soon!

Go Me!!!!

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